Wrestling With God

"Sometimes in the dark of our night seasons, we don't know with whom we are struggling until the light begins to dawn (Beth Moore)."

Many of us have heard the story in Genesis (32) about Jacob wresting with God.  I have often times questioned why in the world someone would do such a thing.  It seems as if it is always going to be a losing battle, right?  Why, knowing how powerful God is, would a person put themselves “in the ring” with the strongest man in the universe?  Is it our arrogance?  Is it simply being naïve?  Or maybe, just maybe, the clever act of challenging the greatest thing of all, God, would be the very thing, and the only thing, that would cause you to rise to greatness and overcome the unknown that you were wrestling with…

I’ve come to the revelation that the phrase “wrestling with God” is no longer a negative one.  In fact, I truly believe that I would have more respect for a person that is bloody and bruised after wrestling with God for a night than I would for a person that said ‘yes’ for 10 solid years without a single question in their mind.  Why?  I believe it shows passion, hunger, and determination to arise to the next level in that particular season of life.  'Wrestling’ does not mean ‘disagreeing’.  To me, it’s the action of asking ‘why?’ and really trying to understand the lesson that God is trying to teach you.  It opens your heart and your mind to fully comprehend it. 

Wrestling with God is opportunity.  It allows us to come up close and get personal with our Saviour.  It’s hands-on.  Our hands get dirty and our bodies get worn.  We feel it, there IS pain, and it doesn’t always feel good, but there’s one thing for sure… it makes every breath we draw sweeter, every sunrise brighter, and every laugh that much more enjoyable.  Why?  It does this because we must fall to wrestle and God is love; therefore, wrestling with God is falling in love.

So what about Jacob?  He was wrestling with this Man and was determined to get a blessing out of Him.  The Man asked to be freed; yet Jacob wouldn’t release Him until he was blessed.  In the midst of all this, the Man dislocated Jacob’s hip.  After finding out Jacob’s name, this Man ended up renaming him ‘Israel’ because he struggled with God and man and had prevailed. 

The next thing Jacob said intrigued me.  He says, “Tell me your name!” and the Man replies, “Why do you ask My name?”  At this point, nearing sunrise, after hours upon hours of wrestling, why would Jacob still be unsure of WHO exactly this Man was?  My speculation on why Jacob felt the need to ask this Man His name was because he had a very good idea of who He was, but had no concrete evidence.  He wanted a black and white answer, but did not get it.  This, I believe, is where our faith comes in.  Time and time again God will move yet He leaves just a little unknown, a little darkness like in this story, so that we have a need to exercise our faith and trust in who He is. 

Jacob named this place where they wrestled ‘Peniel’, which means, “I have seen God face to face and my life is preserved”.  He overcame.  His determination to obtain this blessing caused the greatness that was within him to surface, to rise up and conquer.  This DOES NOT paint a picture of how man can beat God.  It DOES NOT portray God being weak.  This story of Jacob wrestling all night with God and “winning” in the end is a beautiful illustration of passion, of heart, of determination and shows God’s desire to interact intimately with us.  Will we answer? 

One thing that cannot be forgotten in this story is how Jacob was forever changed…physically.  His hip was dislocated while wrestling with God. The pain from a dislocation is momentary, but the effects of a dislocation can potentially be life-long.  I believe this kept him humble.  He encountered God in an intimate way and was never the same again.  It changed him.

After this encounter it was time to move on; sunrise was approaching.  Jacob crossed over Peniel and THE SUN ROSE ON HIM.  Though this was in the physical, it is very much spiritual as well.  It was the dawning of a new day, a new season, a new time for him.  Jacob wrestled with God and his character was shaped from that point on, forever.  When we make the choice to connect with God on an intimate level, when we choose to get up close and personal, when we desire to wrestle with God…we never walk away unchanged.  How hungry are you?  “When God allows or even invites us to wrestle with Him, His constant goal is to make us overcomers. Even when God appears to be against us, He is for us (Beth Moore)." 

 

Convenience Vs. Relationship

As humans, but furthermore, as Americans, we desire convenience at our fingertips.  We want everything to be easy and stress-free.  We have multiple different kinds of deodorants, cereals, shampoos/conditioners and the list goes on.  We have drive-thrus in case we want to grab a quick bite to eat.  And get this, nowadays if you are running low on cigarettes, don’t you worry; you can drive-thru for those as well.

The more time goes on, the more convenient life gets.  More accurately stated, the more time goes on, the lazier we get as human beings.  What do you think?  Now, how exactly does this developing way of life affect us as Christians?  How does the disease of convenience begin to infect our walk with God?  Is there a vast contrast between the way people back in the bible days walked with God and how we do now 2,000 years later? 

If I may, I want to share some thoughts on this topic.  I, with my whole heart, believe that this convenient way of life greatly affects our walk of faith.  I believe that society today wants everything to be immediate, self-gratification at the snap of a finger.  If we have a need, we fill it right then and there, period.  So, how are we as Christians plagued by this weakness?  We find other things in the world to fill a hole that only God can fill- idolatry.  Furthermore, there is an impatience planted deep within us that says to God, “I want this…” or “I need this…” and “…if I don’t get it by the end of this prayer, or by the end of the day, You aren’t as big as You say You are.”   

I have found this to be true in my life.  I feed off the immediate happenings of life.  If I’m having a good day or if I made a lot of money at work (serving tables), then God and I are on a good page.  That’s not when my faith is tested though.  My walk of faith is tested when I go into work and walk out with $12 dollars.  My walk of faith is tested when I hear of some outrageously negative thing done to someone I love.  My walk of faith is tested when injustice is served to me on a shiny platter and I’m expected to partake of it willingly, but I assure you… I WILL NOT!  These are the times when I find out where God and I stand together.  These are the times when I discover if I’m holding God’s hand or if I’m hand in hand with the world. 

Back to square one.  Paul tells us in the New Testament to continually work out our salvation.  Walking with God is a process, it takes time, it takes energy, it takes muscle…we must flex to stand and to stay face to face with God.  Therefore, these convenient days we live in often cause us to grow weary of walking with God simply because, like any other relationship though slightly different because we cannot literally see God, it takes time and energy.  Simple as that.

Have you ever spent one full day, or better yet, one full week with NO TV, NO radio, and no form of media (books, magazines, etc) whatsoever?  If so, I believe it’s comparable to how the people lived back in bible times.  I often wonder why people back then were able to hear God more clearly than people seem to hear God nowadays, or at least clearer than I hear God the majority of the time.  Is it because there were less distractions and not as many things fighting to steal their time and attention?  You can answer that for yourself.

Now knowing that convenience is the disease of this age…what do we do?  We keep first things first and always make sure that we keep our first love our first love- Jesus.  No, it’s not so easy at times to walk with God hand in hand, but it’s so worth it.  It’s all about perspective.  We must not be so focused on the struggles and pain that we feel here and now that we forget what we are fighting for- a genuine relationship based out of love for the One who created us. 

“Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God (Hebrews 12:2).” 

I don’t know what else to say, but I know that all the pain, struggles, confusion, time, energy, patience, questions, etc… everything that arises in our everyday walk with God is worth it so that we can stand face to face with the One, the ONLY one, that completes us.